role models

there is some controversy surrounding the best player in college football, manziel, this year's heisman winner.

apparently he was arrested and had a fake id.

the controversy is the integrity of the football player and the award. it shouldn't go to the best player, it should go to the best player with the highest morals, etc. because "ten year old boys look up to him".

this whole thing saddened me. coming on the tails of the kc chiefs player killing his girlfriend and committing suicide and the dallas cowboys player with the driving while intoxicated we have all kinds of football players being bad examples.

we are overlooking the good examples. i'm not even talking the overtly outspoken christian players. there are so many good men on the football field that work hard, provide for their families, obey the laws and do good.

but we expect them to be heroes.

one thing i know, my life wouldn't live up to that level of scrutiny. i had a fake id. i've told a lie (or two million). i had sex before i was married. i've bounced a check. i could go on. but basically all this says i'm not perfect. you know, "let him who is without sin cast the first stone".

on the issue of role models, we are responsible for our children. the ones god gives us. the ones he places in our homes. we need to teach them right and wrong. we need to teach them to follow god. help them develop a conscience. a love for god that keeps them on the straight and narrow, or at the very least provides a solid foundation so that when if they stray they return to him.

being mad at espn and the college football world and a 19 year old with a golden arm for throwing a football because he is not the perfect role model for your child is expecting too much and frankly is unfair.

the whole "it takes a village to raise a child" might be true in some respects, but when i answer to god for how i raised my son it's going to be me. albert puhols is not going to be standing beside me saying, "no god, that's on me. he looked up to me from miles away and i let him down. i didn't know him, or that he personally existed, but i should have been perfect, as you were perfect, so that he could aspire to be like me. and i don't know his family's values and what they taught him, but i should have met their standard regardless because i'm a famous baseball player."

this may be an extreme example, but i believe that we should teach our kids that it's okay to want to be like sports stars, where the sports part of it comes into play. but in their personal lives, we need to teach them the ways of god. the ways of being good and responsible members of society.

and show them real men as role models.

a math teacher who had life choices i wouldn't agree with, but his professional life and the way he treated my children was above repraoach.

the youth pastor that was overly competitive at sports and really didn't excel at them, but lived a hugely sacrificial life for his family and ministry.

the fifth grade teacher that invested in my son as a small group bible study leader that he still admires

a hillbilly that coached baseball just because he loved the game and showed nate you could win and have fun doing it.

own your behavior. teach your children to own theirs. and use this situation as an object lesson, if nothing else.

manziel did something illegal. he was arrested. no matter how good you are at football, you still answer to the law.

the meaning of christmas

what does it mean to you?

the birth of baby jesus?

celebrating the people you love?

giving gifts?

receiving gifts?

parties?

all of the above?


i told nate the other day that my birthday was just an excuse to be selfish and eat cake. kind of kidding, kind of not. i actually told steve when he asked what i wanted for my birthday that i want everything. (i didn't get it, i guess i'm not the spoiled wife, lol. reality is, i had a great birthday.)

nate texted me on my birthday and said "i'm glad you were born".

i've thought about those words a lot. we celebrate the day someone was born. i'm all for that. i love to celebrate the people i love.


this is attitude i want to have about christmas this year. i want to show that i'm glad jesus was born.

what do i think would make jesus feel celebrated? the greatest commandment is this, love your neighbor as you love yourself.

i'm trying to find ways to show love.

eight weeks

yesterday i ran with steve and we left later than we wanted to so we knew we would be racing on the trail to beat the sun going down. we are finally feeling winter here in kansas, yesterday was chilly and drizzly most of the day. it was bearable, even with the moisture and the damp air. today would not have been.

the whole 5 hours yesterday i was focused on one thing. the two hours i would have today. i didn't make it. i managed an hour workout tonight and then i was done.

saturday after running we went and did three hours of christmas shopping and my feet and legs were hating me. today i feel pretty good.

the workouts with marquis continue. and continue to kick my butt. they are harder and more intense every time. which is the plan. i'm definitely stronger than i was. i'm faster too, but only for short distances. i can run my sprints much faster than before. and my fastest mile yesterday was mile 18. so after running 17 miles i was still able to speed up and run even faster that i had been.

steve was running four miles further than me yesterday, so with an hour from home i had him go on ahead so he would get the most of daylight too. i snapped this picture as he was running ahead. it even looks cold.

another year older...

i am another year older. another year wiser. another year stronger.

and i am glad i'm another year older. am i the only one who gets reflective around my birthday(s)?

the weekend before thankgsgiving i had the chance to think about my age and place in life.

whitney and i went to target. as we were walking out i saw a family heading in. brought back memories, i wanted to laugh so bad. the dad was walking a little ahead of the family, only because he was taller and walked faster (or so i choose to believe) and looked like he would rather be anyplace else. the mom was pushing a cart into the store holding a baby down in the child seat so he wouldn't stand up. another child was hanging off the edge of the cart and two elementary age children were walking with her with one saying, "mom, can i have, can i have..."

i was walking out of the store with whitney holding the keys (because she drives us everywhere) carrying the bag with our four purchases, my bunch of broccoli for broccoli slaw and saline solution and her two birthday gifts for friends that she paid for.

i have loved every stage of my kids lives; babies to teenagers. every stage was precious. from poopy diapers and sleepless nights to elementary age missing two front teeth to the awkward middle school years with their little round baby fat faces and know it all attitudes to high school activities and first dates and heartbreaks and more sleepless nights.

i love the adult children stage. my kids are awesome. not for anything they do or have done. not for their amazing accomplishments at young ages. but for who they are. for what they have learned. for how they behave. they've all screwed up. made bad decisions. but they have learned (or are learning) from them. will they ever be perfect? heck no, (they are my kids, after all). and i'm happy to turn their lives over to them, with the knowledge that though none of us are perfect, i did the very best i could, and i trust that they will continue to grow and learn knowing that i'm so proud of them i could bust.

second example, (must remember to run with headphones) running the turkey trot i was in front of two 20 year old something women on the bike path. i was not eavesdropping. i would've done anything to have not been able to hear them. but they were talking about a 42 year old woman one of them works with and a situation in her life. conversation went something like this:

"yeh, she's 42. doesn't she know how old she is?'
"i know. at some point your body is just too old for some stuff. what was she thinking"

at this point i put my 4 months of sprint training into place and ran off and left them in my dust, with my 44 years and 11 month old body. when i finished the race and looked at final results i am proud to say that in my age group the girls represented. i was 51 out 55 in the 41 - 45 year old age group. that means 51 women 41 or older outran their young butts. i really get that running is something you train for and this was most likely not the first 10 miler that the majority of the 55 women ran, while i know it was one of these 20 somethings first.

here's the thing, i bet all 55 of us know EXACTLY how old we are, and we know what our bodies are capable of. and there were many many many 20 somethings ahead of me. i'm okay with that. and you can think i'm old. just don't tell me what i'm capable of. because i can do anything. better than i could back in the day.

starting line of the turkey trot

i've quote my friend carrie here before, but it's worth repeating because it is so true.

my 44 year old marathon running tire flipping push up doing bear crawling hill sprinting child bearing calorie counting body would kick my 21 year old butt.

i kind of live quoting scriptures to myself, and this one for working out and running does push me along.

ecclesiastes 9:10 Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for in the grave, where you are going, there is neither working nor planning nor knowledge nor wisdom.

so today, on my birthday, i celebrate. every milestone. every experience.

and look forward to next year.

i would love new earphones for my birthday.