For Bella

Last weekend Steve and I went to Memphis. I have a good friend that lives there, and I got to visit with her for several days. Steve came up for the weekend and ran the St. Jude Childrens Hospital Marathon. We're going back next year so I can run. If I can get my knee well enough to run. Certainly going to give it my best effort.

We took the medal and the bib and put it in a shadow box and gave it to her, along with the goodie string bag and a hoodie I got at the expo. There is something about knowing and loving a patient at the hospital that made this hit closer to home. If you think about it, would you pray for Bella? She is currently undergoing Chemo.

He came for me

As Christmas gets closer, I am surrounded by all the things of the season. Christmas programs, Christmas parties, Christmas sermons at church. I am enjoying it more this year than I have in many years.

I don't have any "have tos". I get to participate in what I want to participate in, and I find myself being more involved and loving it. Funny how that works, when I get to decide exactly what I want to do, no one making me or following other's expectations, I do more.

Today, I'm reminded that Jesus came for me. I could say Jesus came for you, or Jesus came for us, and both would be true. But today I need to believe Jesus came for me. ME. How powerful and special that is, that I am enough for Jesus. That he came for me. Broken, imperfect, flawed, and yet, he loves me. Enough to become human and come to earth. Enough to leave a perfect, sinless home, for me.

When I think about heaven and what he left for me, I think of a place with no pain. And that takes on new meaning when you live with chronic pain. Mine is minor, it's my knee. After knee surgery I have chronic pain. Not constant, but at some point every day, I will feel pain in my knee. I can't imagine how people with real issues deal.

And sinless, wow. What would it be like to live without guilt? Shame? Some day, I'll know. I'm looking forward to that. But until then, I love the idea that he came for me.

That's life

Today I got to work at 7:03 a.m. At 7:05 I was in my bosses office. I took Thursday and Friday off and while I was away from work one of my projects blew up. It was a booger of a day.

I went to the gym, because I really need to work out.I've been very disciplined with food, so I need to make sure I get my work outs in. I didn't take my rings off, and bruised my finger under my ring lifting a dumbbell.

I came home and put soup in the chicken tortilla soup in the crock pot and now my hands smell like onions.

My favorite player got voted off of Survivor.

And I sit here and think of how good my life is. How good God is. How good he has been to me. Even on a day when I'm tired, things don't really go my way, I have much to be thankful for.

As I head off to bed, I know I'm going to need to spend some time in prayer tomorrow, because I need God's hand. Whether he fixes the issue or calms me, I'm going to need him.

I am going to be intentional for the next 3 weeks to remember to celebrate this time of year. To not get caught up in busyness. To enjoy the music, all the Christmas trimmings, and reflect on the reason we celebrate.

A new chapter in life - part 2

This one, this woman child of man that is all light and laughter and fun. Gifted with wit and charm and a beautiful smile. The ability to laugh at herself, to find humor in most everything. Thoughtful and kind and good. Mouthy and sarcastic and strong willed. Opinionated and stubborn.

Whitney & Polo, Thanksgiving 2015

Whitney has let me know of her plans to move out by summer 2016. I get it, it's time, she's almost 20. It still pulls at momma's heart, but she's ready. And I think I am too.

Steve and I have a lot of life left in us, and it we are looking forward to all that the future holds.

A new chapter in life

I'm not there yet, not an empty nester, but I'm so close.

Two and a half weeks ago, Nate scheduled and appointment with me for coffee. And to talk. Some things that he had in his life were finally all worked out, and he has some freedom he didn't have previously.

He told me that he wasn't officially engaged, but he and his girl Lily, are going to get married, and he wants to be where she is so he will be getting an apartment in the town she goes to school and moving there after the first of the year. He will finish up college there as well. His credits from Juco will all transfer, it's in state, so he's in a good place.

I watched him move away once before, and it tore my heart out. This time, I'm excited for him. All that life holds. He is a strong courageous good man. So far from perfect, but willing to own his flaws, his mistakes, and work hard to make them right. I've watched him for the last two and half years do the hard things, and I'm one proud momma. I'm still really gonna miss him.

Nate & Lily, Thanksgiving 2015