I am not an artist

I shared that I find myself funny, and I really made myself laugh. I was in a painfully long boring training session. When it starts with the instructor giving the website where I can find the training information, I usually shut down right then. Why do I need you to read it to me? Just give me the web address and let me read it myself. Better yet, I’ll make a note of it, and if I ever need to do this, I will look at it then.
I can do two things at once. It is a gift. I can read and watch TV and know what’s going on in the book and on TV. I can type a paper and watch TV, and not make any typos. I can read and listen to my IPOD and climb on the stair master (without falling off). So listening and doodling comes easy. EXCEPT I CAN’T DOODLE. I am no artist. But I drew this little picture, didn’t have a goal in mind, just boredom and it was just the castle, because I can almost draw a square building. ALMOST. But then class dragged on (and onnnnnnnn) and this developed.

Then when I really looked at it, it made me giggle, right there in the boring training class. Good thing I was sitting at the back of the room, alone. My alligator in my moat is wearing glasses. My dragon is going into the castle, and breathing fire at it, not guarding it from the inside. My prince is slicing his own hand open with his sword, he looks like an alien, not a prince wearing armor, and I’m pretty sure that’s a donkey with extremely tiny legs and hooves with a saddle with tiny little stirrups. And the alien prince is standing in the moat. And maybe carrying the donkey. There are a total of two midget soldiers fighting for each side, and the princess has a mouth that in what must be a Freudian slip is modeled after mine. And does her head look like it is growing out of the turret? If I lived a fairy tale life, this would be my fairy tale. No Cinderella story for me, I’d never lose a pretty shoe, and if I was Snow White, I would have swallowed the poison apple.
I have a theory regarding my lack of artistic ability. My brother, who is 18 months older than me, did this scratchboard picture.

You use an exacto blade and scratch your picture into the black scratch board, and then fill in the scratches with paint. I think my parents depleted all the good artist genes on him, and didn’t have time to replenish new ones before I was conceived. If my theory is plausible, it’s a good reason to wait a couple years to have second and third children. It explains the phenomenon that we have all seen with families that have one extremely talented child and then the one with “a great personality” or “he makes me laugh” or “he has a lot of friends”. THAT ONE WOULD BE ME!!! I find great comfort in the idea that I am created in Christ’s image, and that “I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb.” Jeremiah 1:5
I joke that I swim in the shallow end of the gene pool, but truthfully, I have learned to love myself and the way God made me. There are a lot of things I wish I was better at. There are a lot of things I wish I could do. On facebook I saw a status that “I am tired of mediocrity”. I wanted to respond, “Really? I’m pretty thrilled when I attain mediocrity.” But I knew people would take it wrong. I am not putting myself down, and I don’t aim for mediocrity, I just know that if I do my best, my very best, and 3 out of 6 people do it better than me that makes me mediocre. But it doesn’t mean I didn’t do my best, and if I do my best and I’m mid-range I can live with that.
Two examples: I have shared that I love to run. My husband and my son can run circles around me. They both run faster and can run further. (Heads I run faster, tails I run further, or just run with Steve and do both). But that never takes away my feeling of accomplishment, and being 3rd best before I even leave my front door? Not a problem for me. I love to sing, and again, 3rd best before I leave my house, as my oldest daughter and my husband are both very talented in this area. There have been times in my life where I have been intimidated because I couldn’t measure up. It’s taken a long time to embrace that God has made me with the gifts and talents he wants me to have. (And the flaws that he uses to refine me and expects me to overcome). I’m pretty sure I couldn’t live with the pressure of being really good at something.

I will just embrace the fact that my best quality is that I can make myself laugh.