If I could turn back time...

I wouldn't.

I spent several days wishing I could go back in time. Turn the clock back. Flip the calendar backward. No time machine presented itself.

Then I wanted to see the future. God shut me down on that one in the space of about two hours. But that's a story all on its own, and I'll share that some other time.

This morning we were on our way to church and I was in a funk. Went to bed that way. Woke up that way. Griping at God. Wanting to go back again. Telling him what a mess it was and now it was too late.

But him, being God and all, scolded me and let me know that it's never too late. He reminded me of the story of Lazarus. Not only did Jesus show up after Lazarus died, he was decomposing. Death. Decay. Stink. And with three words, "Lazarus, come forth", Lazarus walked out whole.

My timeline, my limits, my restrictions on God are exactly that. MINE! He has none. So I'm content here in my present. Or should I say in his presence. Watching. Waiting. Believing. Trusting.

Training Update

I ran this morning. 6 miles. It was a 9 mile run. I ran around Sim Golf course, Botanica Gardens, Cowtown, and it was a great run. Then I crossed over the Arkansas River at Central and turned toward home, and didn't feel like running anymore. This was a big deal to me, because I ran the marathon March 19 and have ran all but three days of the last 15. I have logged over 80 miles counting the marathon. I run like the hounds of hell are after me. But when I felt like walking at 6 miles, I walked. And it was no power walk, or keep my heartrate up walk. It was 20 minute miles. It took me an hour to walk home. I enjoyed every minute, too. With two miles to go I got to Mcdonalds, so I stopped and got a diet coke and a breakfast burrito (to go) and walked on home. I'm pretty tired, my plan is to rest for a day or two. But I can't be sure. I may get all Forrest Gump again and "Ahh just felt lahk ruhhnnninn." And if I do, I will.
My ipod froze about 45 minutes into my run, and so I took that as an opportunity to unplug and pray while I ran. For being in the middle of town, running the bike path by the river is pretty serene and it's nature, and it's beautiful. I like to talk to God outside, in his creation. My next race is April 23. I really love the race environment, looking forward to it. Right now, I'm thinking about a nap.

Have a blessed weekend, everyone!

Follow up

Last Tuesday I posted about God speaking to me about getting out of my boat. Now, I've been called hyper spiritual, over spiritualizing things, and I now have to moderate comments before they show up because people are being hateful. Some are bold enough to use names, some are anonymous. But over spiritualizing or not, I have to share this.
Tuesday night I gave Steve my Bible and let him pick the passage and read. He chose John 21:1-11. He chose it for a specific reason, it went with a devotional he found in my Max Lucado study Bible. And it was really good. I'm going to tell the story, you can read it if you want. Peter and the disciples are fishing on the lake. Jesus is on the shore. Jesus calls to Peter, and Peter jumps out of the boat and swims to shore. After the way I felt Tuesday when Jesus told me to get out of my boat, this moved me. I sat there with tears in my eyes. It was one more time Jesus was making sure I knew he was telling me to get out of my boat (quit trying to control, quit trying to fix) and come to him. The first time, I felt he was telling me to get out in the storm and keep my eyes on him. Which is really good, isn't it? But I think the message of the day was get out of my boat and get to Jesus, whether I walk across the water or have to swim for him, do it. I was going to share this sooner, but I really needed to just hold it close for a couple days, because it was pretty special.

Comfort

I woke up this morning with him wrapped around me. The familiar body against me. The weight of his arm around me. His head on my pillow, his breath in my hair. So comforting. So unexpected.