does that make me crazy?

we celebrated a birthday at work. they had cake.


no cake is better than sex.

memories

this is my christmas tree.

i think it's beautiful. (of course i do, otherwise i would change it up). you can't see all my ornaments, but it has quite a collection of random awesomeness on it. two simba ornaments circa 1993. the twelve days of christmas bells that were a promotional item when i worked at j.c. penneys in the late 80's. then angel in the maroon dress that i bought unfinished and painted. the sock monkey. the wreath with nate's name on it from 1st grade. whitney's ice cream stick nativity. you can't see the cow on skis that i got my senior year of high school. or the our first christmas ornament from 1995. steve's treble clef from his senior year of high school.

i love looking at my ornaments. all of them are special. some because of sentiment, some because they are pretty. steve and i put the tree up, he helped with lights and then i did the rest. i picked out exactly what ornaments to put on it. there are some i didn't get out. they have no "special" to them or i don't think they are pretty.

i am planning to redo my living room sometime next month. i was looking for hymns for a project and got out one of the old hymnals to look for my favorites, needing favorite hymns that happen to be in that book and laid out correctly. as i flipped through the pages the melodies rolled through my mind. memories of church as a child, my dad leading some of these hymns, my grandma playing them on the piano, two girls singing a duet of one of them in elementary school.

i've been alive long enough now and my kids are old enough that we actually have family traditions. nothing earth shattering. but things we do that are expected. it's familiar and comfortable. i hope they someday remember these fondly.

me and my memories. i hold on to some of them. i try to let go of others. christmas is always a time for walking down memory lane. it's a place on the timeline of life that rolls around every year. measurable. i hope next year at this time when i remember christmas past and years past that i have no regrets for how i spent 2013.

ten weeks

ten weeks till i attempt my first ultramarathon. i have until the first week of january to drop and get my money back. not that i plan on that, but i do know i have that option...

i haven't felt much like sharing. not that there isn't a lot going on, there always is. new grandbaby, nate's been home twice, new running clothes, whitney got her nose pierced (my first trip to a tattoo parlor) major indoor soccer league soccer game, movies, running, training, church, christmas pre-shopping, job change at work...

you know, just life. hopefully i'll shake off my whatever it is and get back in the full swing of life.

in the meantime, happy holiday season to everyone!!!

enjoy the lights, the crowds, the music, and a wee little bit of the sweet treats!

i get by with a little help from my friends

today is sheila's birthday.

everyone needs a friend like sheila.

when i told her i was going to train for a half marathon she didn't laugh or belittle me or say i couldn't do it. she asked for my training plan and ran with me.

that was over 4 yearsago.

last month we ran our 4th half marathon together, (i don't know how many races total we've run together and separate, it's a lot). when i wiped out at mile 13, she came to help me up and check on me to make sure i was okay.

three weeks later when i was at her house we were talking about it and she laughed. describing it. how i was so excited to be finishing. how it looked like slow motion. how i jumped up and kept running. she laughed so hard she couldn't talk.

yep, everyone needs a friend like this.

a friend all in for the crazy stuff, yet compassionate and caring when you're down and ABLE TO LAUGH HER BUTT OFF AT YOUR when it's all said and done.


happy birthday sheila!

does that make me crazy?

yes, this DOES make me crazy.

the adventures of wander woman

life is an adventure.

everyday there is something to be excited about.

someone to love.

something to do.

this week totally got away from me. it was crazy busy and whitney and were both sick and just so much stuff going on.

we had two meetings/parties/lunches with two local running organizations this weekend. food was good, and we love the people in our running community.

i ran the turkey trot for the fifth straight year. my plan was to "stay" with steve, he's been running for a week after 3.5 months off for back surgery. we got to mile 2 in seventeen minutes, a pace i cannot maintain and my strategy of staying with steve went out the window and i went to "plan a" which is always the same, finish and feel okay when you get done.

per usual, time was consistent with what i always run, attitude was consistent (meaning i had moments i loved and moments i hated and moments i wished i'd never started running) but when i saw steve at mile 9.5 come back to finish with me it made my race. such a happy girl when that happens.

with the 30 days of thankfulness i see on facebook i've had moments where i've thought about what i'm thankful for this month.

it has varied from the altruistic

thankful for my healthy kids
thankful for my job and benefits


to the extremely shallow and selfish

thankful for the diet coke in my refrigerator
thankful for my kinesiology tape
thankful for my dvr
thankful for two cars

i have a very blessed life. i'm very aware of that. very thankful for that. i just wish i could always be that way, and not have my moments of selfishness, self pity, self absorption, well, you get the idea. always will be working on that.

mostly, i realize that i love my life. i'm generally very happy. that is in addition to the joy i have with jesus as my savior.

Turkey Trot 2012

now i'm going to go sit on the couch and watch the music awards with steve.

have a great holiday week!

does that make me crazy?

i found a darling dress on the clearance rack at target because the size was mis-marked.

i paid $5.98 for the dress.

then i paid $12.00 for tights to wear with it.

why do i exist?

my saturday/sunday facebook and twitter feed had the usual "sermon was so great, i know god answers my prayers", "i'm shutting out the noise and listening to god", "he works all things for my good", just over and over, several churches represented where everyone was so positive and upbeat about what god was doing for them.

i thought this was great. so awesome.

then i went to the 10:45 service at my church sunday morning. i love jeff a little more every week. talked about the attitude of servanthood. attitude of humility. attitude of obedience. did you get that? all things i should be doing. no god's gonna do all this for you (which i get, i believe, i like to hear this too) but what i got was a good talking to about what i should be doing for god.

ended with two questions, why should i have an attitude like christ? to glorify god.

what do i need to surrender today? i don't want to share that. more than one is on the list though.

the last thing i scribbled on my bulletin was this comment made at the end of the sermon...

god does not exist for us, we exist for him.


i have to admit that i get in the mindset that he is at my beck and call. that i have a right to question and whine and even demand. not true.

as i enter the christmas season (i put my tree up today, it's bee-yooo-tee-ful) i want to remember all he did for me. already. and think about why i exist and what i can do for him this christmas season.

the opportunities to give our huge, and i'm working on several. whether it's time, money or energy, i want to fully experience and enjoy the next 6 weeks with christ at the center.

12 weeks to go

some days i think there is no way i'll be ready and some days i feel very good about the race and myself. i had both those this week.

I didn't get to run as much or as far as i would have like to this week. but today's 6 mile run was one of the best i've had in a while, i was able to pick up speed on the uphill with at five miles and was able to sprint the last 4 blocks, even after the hill.

i also had two of the hardest workouts with marquis yet, one was a 30 minute session in the sand pit. it included throwing medicine balls, sprinting with resistance bands, pulling tractor tires and flipping tractor tires.

all in all, i feel stronger than ever.

and i got to run with steve for the first time in 4 months. he's released to exercise and is so happy about that. a little pain in his back, but he was able to log a 4 mile run and a 6 mile run. i'm pretty happy about that.

conversations with whitney

simba and nala for halloween

does that make me crazy?

i made a chocolate sheet cake for my girls birthday this weekend. there was too much of it left so i wrapped it up in some rubbermaid and left it on sheila's porch.

the crazy part?

i would give away 6 pieces of cake because i'm sure i could've eaten them all by myself. and whitney and steve would've known it was me. that's my problem with it. not that i can eat 6 pieces of cake. but that i don't want my family to know i could.

my right to complain

shut the &$%@# up

yep. comment made at work today. “get out and vote. if you don’t, shut the &$%@# up”.

hear it all the time, if you don’t vote you don’t have the right to complain. people who are more familiar with our constitution and our rights feel free to confirm or deny this, but i’m guessing the right to complain is covered in free speech??? and if this is so, i have this right whether i vote or not. i get to complain just because it’s the american way.

i wonder how many other countries watch our uproar over voting on our new leader and laugh at the “united” states of america. could we be more divisive?

but we do have the freedom to elect our own leader.

i don’t say much anything about politics. i know what I believe. i know what is important to me. i know what issues matter to me. i won’t change anyone’s mind or opinion by anything i say, and it’s also my right to keep my opinion to myself. (i rarely do, though). i know that your issues may not be my issues, and that definitely comes into play when we decide who we will vote for. we may agree on 90% of everything, but our important issue, whether it's economy, women's rights, gay rights, pro-life, death penalty (also pro-life??) may be the one deciding factor.

it’s an honor and responsibility to vote, and i will, right after work.

i keep thinking today about proverbs 21:1. the king’s heart is like a flowing stream in the hands of our god. he can direct it where he wills. god changes the hearts of kings. when i think that god can change and direct the hearts of our leaders it gives me peace.

and not just our world leaders, all leaders. business leaders. family leaders. school leaders. church leaders.


no matter who is elected, god is still greater. more powerful. able to direct and change hearts.

just like he had a plan to save the world after its fall when adam sinned, he has a plan for our country (our world) after election today.

no matter who i vote for, no matter if i vote or i don’t, this is one thing that I will never “shut the &$%@# up” about - our god.

training update

i am loving this weather. perfect running weather.

i had a couple of tough work outs with marquis, i'm loving getting to work hard. i love getting stronger and faster. i love the stress release.

i'm hitting the point in my training plan where i run a lot of miles. longer runs on wednesdays, sundays are longer. lots of miles a week, lots of time spent. and i like it.

i'm trying to be careful and stay healthy. that's my biggest goal, that and getting stronger.

conversations with whitney

gotta love a teacher that tweets pictures of what your high school student is doing in class

she was one of a very few that would dissect the dead rat.

changing seasons

i’m not very busy. not really. and that makes the fact that i have a whole mountain of stuff to do that much more unbelievable. (stuff i'm behind on).

that could change. i could be busy again. but only as busy as i want to be.

i run, workout (a lot of time, 2 hours at the gym yesterday), watch tv (more than two hours), read, go to church, work, sleep, eat, you know, all the normal stuff. but I no longer have kids in sports and music and drama (no drama as in theater, I have four daughters, there will always be drama). we aren’t volunteering at church (shocked? it’ll happen sometime, just not till god says.)

part none of me misses those busy days. at first I thought i did. but i love my life. the freedom. doing what I want to a large extent.

we have anneshia on sundays still and while i was running up the stairs and sliding down the slide with her over and over and over i asked steve if he was sorry we didn't have the child i wanted when whitney was 2. he made a face at me. he never wanted another child after whitney, and is so glad to be on the final stretch of raising her. honestly, i'm glad i don't have a freshman.

seasons of life. it’s just like weather seasons. they change. i love all four seasons. or eight seasons? however many there are. i love spring – rainy spring and dry spring. I love summer. i love beyond summer into 110 degrees with 100% humidity. i love fall. whether it’s 40 degree fall days or 80 degree fall days (like today, almost makes it worth sleeping in and not running this morning to enjoy the beautiful afternoon), but it is still fall and you can tell. and i love winter, the mild, the snow, the below zero temperatures, the holidays.

i also love my central heating and air, heated car seats, windshields with built in defrosters, boots, full length coats, ice water, swimming pools, cook outs, chili, hot drinks and electric blankets.

seasons of life.

ecclesiastes 3 talks about this - the whole chapter is worth reading, but

verses 1:4

there is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,


my time for weeping and mourning and healing is about over. god has done such a work in my heart, and i want to laugh and dance and build...

and i love verse 11

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.

he makes everything beautiful in his time. he understands eternity. he is not bound by time. by our short life spans. when you feel you can't take another day another minute of how things are, remember in his time. and he is not measuring it the way we do.