Been feeling pretty down lately actually told my husband the other day that that was just one more reason it sucked to be me. (I know, Newspring, I heard the sermon on being a victim, I’m working on it. It’s okay for you to feel sorry for me. Compassion is a good quality. Self pity is the sin.) Instead of hearing what I deserved from that comment, he listed several things that were good about me. I say he’s the number one reason it’s good to be me. Some of the things he said I’m good at are not things that people want to be good at, and some I’m not willing to share, but it reminded me of the episode of Friends where Monica is upset because she finds out she doesn’t give good backrubs until she finds out that she gives the worst backrubs which makes her the best at bad backrubs so she is excited to be the best at being bad.
I think of the scripture in Ecclesiastes 9:10-11 “10Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might; for there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor wisdom, in the grave, whither thou goest. 11I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all.” (KJV)
“10 Whatever you do, do well. For when you go to the grave,[a] there will be no work or planning or knowledge or wisdom. 11 I have observed something else under the sun. The fastest runner doesn’t always win the race, and the strongest warrior doesn’t always win the battle. The wise sometimes go hungry, and the skillful are not necessarily wealthy. And those who are educated don’t always lead successful lives. It is all decided by chance, by being in the right place at the right time.” (NLT)I love the last line of verse 11 in the Message “Sooner or later bad luck hits us all”.
We are told whatever we do, do it with our might, do it well. And we are told that the strongest and fastest don’t always win. (I particularly love this). And a college degree doesn’t necessarily guarantee a successful life. This comes from Solomon’s wisdom, thousands of years ago. I wonder, who decides whether we win? Who decides if we’re good enough? Of course, God does, not going to debate that. But here, on this earth, who gets to tell me I’m not good enough, that what I do doesn’t matter? Anyone who has the guts. BUT I DON’T HAVE TO BELIEVE IT. When I run 5.5 miles in 51:53 and it’s the best time I’ve ever had, only to have my 16 year old nephew tell me he ran his 5.5 miles in cross country conditioning in 35:32, that doesn’t take away from my success (I know, comparing myself to a 5’11” 16 year old boy is a ridiculous, however true example), it just makes me proud of him. And I will go and watch him run cross country this fall and cheer him on. And comparing myself to the lady that had gastric bypass and lost 100+ pounds in less than a year while I’m still working my 80 off after 3 years? Good for her, but it doesn’t diminish what I’ve done. I need to remind myself that God doesn’t expect me to be better than someone else. He expects me to do it mightily, to do it well, to the best of my ability, not try to keep up with or outdo everyone else. God has given me unique and special gifts. I sometimes think I have the kind of gifts your crazy grandma with Alzheimer’s gives. The crocheted doll that covers your toilet paper. A card for your 16th birthday with a clown holding a balloon that says “For the birthday girl” and there’s a dollar inside. The pierced earrings that weigh 6 pounds each that make you look like an African goddess after wearing them for 10 minutes. I have unique and special (crazy???) gifts. I’m not sure what to do with them. I still haven’t figured out what Steve meant when he said I was good at sarcasm. I do joke that it’s my spiritual gift, and I know that my warped view of life has probably kept me off anti-depressants for the last 6 years. I am not alone with my uniqueness, I have a friend who told me her calling was to be the “Junior Holy Spirit” which I found hilarious, and offered to make her a cape. Do you have a unique gift? Something you are good at that might seem odd to others?
If you can harness your sarcasm to be a good thing, then you're one up on me. My sarcasm tends to be quite harsh but it comes so NATURAL. That's downright scary and not at all good.
ReplyDeleteGod created all of His children to be unique and unlike any other. Methinks He might be starting to peel back the layers so that you can finally see just how He has equipped you for kingdom service.
While no one gift particularly stands out to me, I see the evidence of many in you. You're runnin' the race with endurance, both figuratively and literally! :-)