Because it has been 21 years. And it doesn't feel like yesterday. And now, when I look at my grizzly man, full grown, grizzly beard, handsome, smart, hard working, I don't see the little boy anymore. I hold that in my heart, and will forever.
What I mostly feel is every pain he has. You think when your kids grow up and get on their own and make their own money and lives that it gets easier. But I have found that to be false.
Maybe it's just my adult kids, but their choices have led to some pretty rough times. Circumstances have dealt them some tough blows. It's a hard world out there, and just being in it is a challenge.
Nate has some "stuff" going on. It hurts. I can't fix it. I can't really even help. All I can do is watch and pray and hope (and cry and worry) and love him. But that's part of being a parent.
But all that aside, happy birthday to the man who will forever hold a special place in my heart that no one else can touch.
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