I'm heeled

Not a typo, just a bad pun. My heel is better. It took a while, lots of hours of alternate training, gained a few pounds, fortunately just a few, but I am able to run again. Ran a 10K on Saturday. I ran the same race last year, and this year's time was slower by a couple of minutes. But a friend from church was running her first 10K and she started out strong, and was ahead of Sheila and I until about 7K mark. When we caught up to her I didn't have the heart to run ahead and leave her, so I lost a few minutes of time. My race strategy is start off at a certain (slow) pace, regardless of how I feel, and then finish strong. I struggled with pain in both calves for the first 4K and then everything fell into the groove and I was good. We were on a pace to finish faster than we did last year, which was a good feeling. But since I never run for time, I run to finish, it's no big thing. I am now training for another 10K in May, a half marathon in June and a marathon in October, all right here in nice flat Wichita!

As I sat in Good Friday service I didn't verbally participate in the worship songs. Since I love music and I love to sing, this is out of character. We were singing "what can wash away our sins, what can make us whole again" and I just had this overwhelming feeling of sadness that I may never feel whole in this life. I have shared pieces of my struggles, and I know that God is working big in my life. We were going to celebrate communion, and whenever I see the communion plates at the front of the sanctuary I immediately begin examining myself. And I saw a few things that I didn't like. Along with that, I couldn't help but feel sadness for some people in my life, people that I love. This is where the concept of wholeness started working on me. Even as healthy, functioning people are we whole? I felt like something was missing. But move forward to Easter and I was reminded me that someday I will be whole. Jesus paid much to high a price for me, and because of this it is worth the constant scrutiny of my life to see what I I continue to need to change as I strive to live a Christ honoring life. I think the brokenness and need in my life keeps me humble before him.