My Responsibility

I read Matthew 6 this morning, and it has been spinning in my head all day. It's not a new passage, or a new concept to me, yet for some reason it really made me think. Hard. Praying should be done in our room with the door closed, or should be a private matter, not done to prove to everyone how Godly we are. We should use the words necessary, but not ramble on like the pagans, because God already knows what we need before we ask. We should give in secret, not so the world knows what we are doing, because then we have already received our reward. Then later, Scripture tells us by our fruits everyone will know us.
What really got to me today with this is the idea that we plant our seeds and water them in private, and then our fruit will be seen by all. If my life is not producing fruit, there is a problem with my private life. I can't blame it on not being fed at church. It's not the pastor's fault or the Bible study leaders fault. It's not the type of worship music we sing. My spiritual life is my responsibility. I can enhance it with church and Bible Study's and connection groups, but they can't do it for me.